After speaking in hundreds of marriage events to tens of thousands of married Christians there is one observation for which I fear no contradiction: namely, most Christians did not form their view of sexuality based upon scripture.

When Risqué is Okay is a practical, plain spoken, non-clinical approach to sex inside of marriage. Its perspective is distinctly Biblical because something this important to life should be biblically informed. It addresses questions that are often too embarrassing to ask and teaches truths from which you will instantly see a benefit.

WARNING: This book is both direct and explicit. If practical instruction about sexual behavior inside of the marriage bedroom is offensive to you, it is probably better for you to read something else. While no street language is used and there are no explicit photographs, there are frank instructions about sexual behaviors. Please purchase accordingly. The author does not desire to offend those who believe it is inappropriate to give biblical training on such matters . Up front is best.

“The author lays it on the line with humor and a direct approach that will both surprise and engage you. The subject matter is rated "M" to target married people exclusively because the book contains information unsuitable for youth and single adults.”

  1. What does the Song of Solomon have to say about oral sex?

  2. What are some of the things you need to say to your son or daughter before they go on their honeymoon?

• What can be done to turn a good marriage into a great one?

• When you are finished having sex, do you also feel loved?

• How can you help your wife feel so beautiful that she loses all inhibitions in the bedroom?

  1. How do you make love play a 24/7 proposition rather than an exercise in exhaustion placed last on your to-do list?

  2. Is there a way to understand your husband’s moods and lessen his anger?

  3. How do you help your husband avoid the honey trap?

  4. How do you know which bedroom acts are acceptable and how to have a biblical attitude toward sex?

  5. What can you do to keep your marriage hot and fresh rather than cold and clammy?

Click here to see the Table of Contents

Now sold into all 50 states and 12 foreign countries.

368 pages • Softcover

$19.95 + P&H


Most individual purchases ship USPS Priority Mail. If you would rather order by mail, click here.

Quantity discounts available by the case (30 books). Church and church bookstore discounts (25%) are also available on 6 or more copies. For quantity or discount purchases, please contact by e-mail. Purchases outside of the USA require additional postage–please contact by e-mail.

A few of the responses:

NE pastor & family speaker - PUBLISH! PUBLISH! PUBLISH! ...This book is truly PROFOUND. It will have a MAJOR impact on as many marriages as we can get it into!!!!!!!

Texas pastor - We have thoroughly enjoyed the read and I found nothing that should be offensive to any sincere and honest marriage that has any fire to it at all.

Indiana pastor - Thank you for being frank, humorous, honest, and candid and for putting into print what has needed to be said for a long time.

Missionary to China - This book has already had a tremendous impact upon our marriage...Nothing has offended me but several things have made me blush.

Mid-west wife - I laughed outright at so many things...I bristled with excuses as to why I don't meet my husband's needs in some areas...It wasn't just informative but convicting too!

Iowa pastor - I want to commend you for being blunt and appropriate at the same time. I think you were wise in saturating it with humor, making us more comfortable with the subject. It is an excellent book.

Oregon husband - It made me blush and a few things made me mad. But mostly it made me a better husband and lover. I can't believe you said some of that but thank you for doing so. I needed to hear it.

Nevada wife - Ever since I read your book my husband tells me I send him to heaven.

Arkansas pastor - You've just become at the very top of my favorite author list. Praise God for the book. I was on a missions trip when I saw a copy of it. I never thought I would live to see the day when a Baptist preacher would have the anointing of God and such holy boldness to deal with issues like you did. I want you to know it was a tremendous breath of fresh air. My wife and I deeply appreciate it.

West coast pastor - I got the book and my wife and I read it. We have been doing what you said. Those truths have changed my marriage forever. And in changing my marriage, they have changed my life.

Maryland pastor - When you showed it to us in the Bible I accepted it and our marriage has been greatly helped.

Colorado pastor - We have just completed our second family vacation. Thank you for encouraging us to do the things we always knew we should but weren't making happen.

South America missionary - Your ministry is helping people all over the world and we praise God for that!

Mid-west - Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. FABULOUS BOOK! Such a blessing! Am so excited to "share the wealth".

Bolivia - We are enjoying the book and it has really helped our marriage. We would love to have the book in Spanish. Many marriages in South America are in trouble. If the couples are not saved most men have a mistress, but once they become Christians the ladies seem to be very hush hush about intimate issues, and very scared.

From California - I was seeking for a way to terminate my marriage...A pastor's wife loaned me that book and it has totally changed my life and our home. So instead of terminating my 20 year marriage, we have really changed. I know you probably receive a lot of flack on your book but I just want you to know that I appreciate it very much and just want to say thank you. Great job. Thank you very, very much. Bless you.

Washington State - I am grateful for many Bible truths you have taught. But I am particularly thankful that you show the way to a happy intimate life. Christians have got to learn how to live and enjoy life. We have.

SoCal pastor’s wife - I am a HUGE fan of this book.

California wife - I have noticed an anger problem in my husband most of our marriage and always wondered why. He loves the Lord and me. Once I began implementing the principles in your book, it was amazing. His under-current of anger vanished and has never returned. Then I felt guilty. I believe I have had a part in his anger for many years and just didn't understand. Delighting him now delights me, as does having a husband who is happier, more playful, and more even-tempered.

West coast wife - We have been married for [many] years and I have never had pleasure in the bedroom myself a single time. It wasn't my husband's fault. He tried hard enough. But I was raised in a home where sex was always spoken of as dirty and evil, when it was spoken of at all. Since reading your book and allowing my heart to open to God's plan of sexual excitement with my husband, I have enjoyed pleasure like never before...and that has lit my husband up too. For me, it wasn't physical but mental dysfunction that needed correction. Thank you very, very much.

Texas parents with married children - We bought your book for all our married children. Our daughter called us to say she stayed up all night and finished it in one sitting.

A fallen former-pastor writes - I received the beautiful book yesterday. Your illustrations are hilarious and keep me glued to the book. I must warn you that you will be ridiculed and criticized because you are dealing with a subject unacceptable in most Baptist circles. But you are right and they will be wrong. The book is desperately needed and pastors need the book to guide them as they breach this subject in their churches and even in their own home. I wish I could have had it when I was [much younger]. Things would have been quite different for me.

Pastor friend - Your material about pre-paring a husband for a trip was incredible!  How many marriages will that save?  How many eyes will it open?  How many affairs will it prevent?

Pre-publication peer reviewer - You are killing me with laughter! The people on this plane are starting to wonder why I'm laughing so hard out loud!

California pastor’s wife writes - I believe this will help ANY marriage. We call this book the “marriage bible.” The book you wrote took our marriage from "okay" to "fireworks". It has never been the same since. When that part of your marriage is good, many other things start falling into place. I believe many marriages don't view this as a priority, but they are linked. 

Missionary to the Philippines - We are thankful for your introduction and the explanation as to why the subject of sex needs to be discussed among Christians. We knew it was important, but after reading your thoughts, we now believe it is crucial...This book is awesome. Your humor keeps us rolling...

Husband in the Carolinas - It took us 40 years of marriage to figure out what you wrote in a few pages. How I wish we could go back and relive our youth once again with that knowledge under our belt.

From Colorado - I thought we already had a great marriage and an exciting bedroom. But it just keeps getting better, especially after your book.

New York pastor - What an outstanding resource!  Not only is the subject material very Biblical, it is side-splitting humorous!

Louisiana pastor's wife - This should be required reading for every young wife and many older ones.

California pastor - I bought the book to mine the information as a resource for my marital counseling but found new excitement for my own marriage also.

Southern pastor - God bless you for having the courage to say it straight. It is bold and direct, and that is what we need today.

Western business owner - The only unhappy thing in our marriage is our bedroom life. I have been praying for an answer for seven years. I couldn't believe it when I opened the book and looked inside. I didn't know something like this existed. Thank you so much.

Oklahoma Reformers Unanimous leader - We have couples in our program because of sexual problems. We also have a lot of couples in church with the same struggles who are too proud to come to RU. I hope your book has a part in a spiritual awakening towards sexuality.

From a personal friend - I saw the love and excitement that you and Karen have kept in your marriage for many years. I want that too. I'm beginning to understand how to go about it. I laughed all the way through.

Illinois wife - I appreciate your mix of humor and honesty to help me receive your message.

NW husband - We've been drifting a part for some time. We have both felt rejected, angry, and depleted. I have decided to fill her heart up again, like before we got married, and live the abundance principle you explained.

East coast wife - I read the whole book in two days. My husband and I loved it. Thank you for being so straight-forward.

Texas wife - I stayed up and read it all the way through in one night. I can’t wait to do what you have taught!

Tennessee wife - Thank you for teaching about such a delicate issue so truthfully but graciously.

Missionary to Asia - I am an eyewitness of you, your family, and your ministry. Your family was the best family I had ever seen and I still think that.

Midwest - You obviously have great wisdom in this area and have the intestinal fortitude to deliver the message in a very tactful manner. GREAT JOB!

California pastor - You are the apostle of sex to our Christian marriages (just kidding). Wow. We honestly did not know what we were missing. You CAN teach an old dog new tricks. Thank you so much.

West Coast pastor - I have read this book three times. Love it!

Indiana husband - As I have gotten older, my interest has not decreased but my performance has required more patience. In fact, sometimes I don't even want to try because I am afraid of failure. Your book has influenced my wife to such a patient, helpful, and frequent spirit that I look forward to every opportunity to fool around with her.

Texas wife - When I first heard of a micro-date my first thought was, "Great, here is one man giving another man (my husband) justification for spending even less time with me." But I was wrong. I love micro-dates and have never felt more pampered. In fact, several of them have turned into astro-dates.

Midwest pastor - We have had severe marital problems...We are not completely right but we are so much better...We both still have a long way to go. But now we know what to do. Thank you and please pray for us.

California pastor - Thank you for your time and effort in producing a quality book on a sensitive subject. Our church will be selling this fabulous resource to our people.

A wife writes - Thank you so much for writing this wonderful book!  I am devouring it. I am applying what I have learned already, and find that it's tough sometimes, but things are getting better.  You really do have that abundance vs. depletion thing dead on. You both are brave souls for putting this book out.  I'm sure many marriages will be saved, and countless marriages renewed with much pleasure.  Ours has been.

West coast associate pastor - You are hum-orous, direct, insightful, and you're saying things that people know in their heart should be said, but few have the guts to say them.

Texas evangelist - Now how in the world am I supposed to get any work done today after reading that?  You know where I want to be.

Associate pastor - We both wish someone had shared these thoughts with us early in our marriage, or even prior to that.  Problem is, even though both of us come from healthy homes, we doubt our parents experience this kind of freedom with each other...which would in turn make it difficult and even impossible for them to pass along these instructions and values.  At the very least, they never felt comfortable giving us any instruction.  We have spent many years learning these lessons, and some of them so recently that we regret we didn't have this information earlier.

E-mail - You bring a godly and biblical kind of freedom to light like a breath of fresh air and a gigantic sigh of relief. And you give permission for husband and wife to fully render to each other what God intends. You validate what scripture teaches but what some people "wonder" about and are afraid to discuss–often even with each other.